Forgiveness, Healing & Moving Forward
Disclaimer: Healing is your journey, and forgiveness is not mandatory. This is your story. You’re the one who decides what forgiveness means.
At its core, forgiveness isn’t about absolving, excusing or forgetting.
It’s about letting go of the resentment and anger that weighs you down.
Forgiveness is not a gift you give someone else.
Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself.
Forgiveness for Yourself
You did nothing wrong.
Someone else chose to harm you, and you are not to blame.
It doesn’t matter what you wore, how you acted, or any other self-blaming narrative you’ve been taught.
You did nothing wrong.
It’s far too easy to turn the anger you feel toward your attacker inward.
You can become your own worst enemy.
Self-forgiveness is about breaking that cycle.
The cycle of self-blame, guilt, and shame.
It’s about treating yourself with the kindness and compassion you deserve.
Try This!
Acknowledge the hurt:
You might blame yourself for what happened and hold onto anger and resentment.
Understand the context:
You were trying to make sense of the senseless, trying to cope with trauma with no tools or guidance.
Take responsibility:
You may have hurt yourself in an attempt to protect yourself from the pain of what happened. You didn’t deserve that.
Show compassion:
You were hurt. You did your best to survive. But you can choose to be kind to yourself now.
Learn from it:
You can stop blaming Yourself. We can recognise that you were never the problem.
Let go of the past:
You deserve love. You deserve peace. You’re moving forward, and you won’t carry this weight anymore.
Forgiveness for the Person Who Hurt You
You don’t have to forgive those who have caused you harm.
But you do have to decide what you want to do with the anger they’ve left behind.
Holding onto that anger keeps you tied to them and they don’t deserve that space in your life.
Forgiveness, if you choose it, is a tool — a way to loosen the chains of resentment and anger that link you to the past.
It doesn’t mean excusing their actions.
It doesn’t mean you forget.
It means you acknowledge the hurt they caused, place the blame where it belongs, and choose to let go of the emotional weight that keeps you bound to them.
Forgiveness is about freeing yourself, not them.
Forgiveness for Those Who Should Have Protected You
What about the family members and friends who failed you?
The ones who didn’t believe you, didn’t protect you, or responded with anger or indifference?
Forgiving them is a heavy decision.
And in some cases, it may involve reconciliation.
The truth is, some relationships will never be the same.
You have to decide if they are worth continuing or not.
If you choose to continue those relationships, forgiveness becomes essential for your own peace.
But that doesn’t mean you erase the pain.
It means you choose to move forward in a way that protects your healing.
Forgiveness for a Society that Has Failed You
You have no choice but to continue navigating a world that often fails to support you.
The legal system, the culture, and the societal norms expose and gaslight us all too often.
But as painful as it is, sometimes forgiveness is what keeps you going.
It’s not about letting society off the hook.
It’s about acknowledging that, as deeply flawed as the systems are, they aren’t intentionally malicious.
It’s like dealing with a child who repeatedly makes the same mistake — our societal systems need to learn, and until they do, we need to keep pushing for change.
Forgiveness here doesn’t mean we stop fighting.
It means we keep our hope alive and continue working toward a better future.
Forgiveness is not a one-size-fits-all concept.
It’s not something we owe anyone, not even ourselves.
We choose it because it’s a step toward freedom — on our terms, in our time.
It's time to move forward with love and peace.
You are enough.
Join Our Monthly Check-in
The MCI is a group dedicated to providing a safe, compassionate, and empowering space.
In this space, survivors can connect, share, and heal.
What Happens?
We come together, connect, and catch up on life!
There’s no agenda — just good conversation about whatever comes to mind.
It’s a relaxed, informal space where everyone’s welcome to share, learn, and enjoy the moment.
Don’t miss out — come join the conversation and be part of the next check-in!
If you have any questions or concerns, please contact us directly.
We'd love to have you with us!
Marta & Tara
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